You’re a watermelon on a summer’s day, and a lavender chocolate at night. Like a clementine, you’re proof positive that life’s alright. You are bountiful like an orchard. You are sweet like grandma’s jam. And I could never, ever trade you away, for all the farms in France. You’re a mango on a beach in Rio, a corn barbeque on the beach here. You are rice and eggs and sushi and Uncle John’s homemade beer. You’re foie gras that ain’t gross, maybe made of fudge, and all the harvest of the fall. You’re a bowl of cherries, the size of Carnegie Hall. You want me to count up the ways you’re fine, 1, 2, 50 billion bottles of wine. You little beaujolais bouncin’ up and down upon my tongue. You’re the apple from the forbidden tree, and then the aftermath is what you do to me. I wanna track that snake down, and give him a cigar. Babe, you’ve had the same lovers I’ve had, make your stomach turn, and make your heart sad. They got hearts of crap dinner, and faces of red #3. I don’t wanna make a big deal of it, that’s OK for them, but I’m offa that. I got food in my cupboard, and you make a glutton out of me. You are all the fish in the ocean. You’re the ice cream that’s at the fair. You’re a regional thing that just fits in everywhere. You’re espresso in the morning. Milk & honey when it’s time for bed. In the middle of the night, if you’re by my side, I’m gonna sleep like a baby well fed. You’re my daily bread and water. You’re my pleasure and my need. And all the others out there are just processed American cheese. You’re the cutest little tomato that ever ripened on the vine. Like cheese and whiskey, you just get better with time. I’ll smack my lips and say my grace. Thank Mother Nature for your body and your face. I’m a growing boy, see, gotta keep that energy up. I’ll dive down into 7 meals a day. They say you live a longer life that way. Oh man, am I ever gonna eat you up.